Dragon Pox Protection Program
by Nuuhtella
Summary: Ahh Kwidditch, how I love thee!


Written for the QLFC Season 5 - Round 9

Tutshill Tornados - Chaser 2

Prompt: Gloves - Write about a witch or wizard protecting someone.

Optional Prompts:  
[7] Because when you are imagining, you might as well imagine something worthwhile. (Anne Shirley) ― L.M. Montgomery, Anne of Green Gables (quote)  
[12] "If I was a foot taller, would it have made a difference?" (dialogue)  
[13] "Should we tell him that it's fake?" (dialogue)

 **Word Count:** 1,653

* * *

A soft breeze rippled across the village of Towton, giving the inhabitants a much needed reprise from the unyielding heat. Four friends had taken advantage of the unusually good weather and ventured to an empty field a few miles away to practice for their upcoming kwidditch match. Unfortunately, three of their members were unable to attend but this did not dampen their spirits for they knew that they were the better team. The four of them were on their brooms, zooming around the makeshift pitch. They had erected one set of shoddy hoops just to practice against and were running different manoeuvres.

Goodwin Kneen was the captain of the village team and played as a catcher alongside his wife, Gunhilda. Although Goodwin _was_ technically the captain it was Gunhilda who tended to boss the team around and nobody fought her on this for fear of being transfigured into some sort of rodent for three days – the fate that had befallen the previous captain. Ugga was one of the team beaters and also the village drunk. He was often late or drunk or both but the team put up with him as nobody else in the village could deter the blooders so well. Randulf was the team reserve and a good friend of Goodwin's. He wasn't the best player due to his constant daydreaming and would often stop whatever he was doing at the time without thinking of the consequences. He drove Gunhilda mad and everyone was sure that was half the reason Goodwin was so pally with him.

They continued to play for most of the morning at Gunhilda's insistence. Beads of sweat began to form on Goodwin's brow but he daren't ask his wife for a break. She was often rather jovial but today was not one of those days. Ugga had already tested her patience when he pulled a flask of wine from his jacket pocket and began swigging it mid-air. The Radulf crashed into a nearby tree while consumed by one of his daydreams. By midday, Gunhilda was mad as a hare and so Goodwin hastily suggested they stop to enjoy the picnic.

"Fine," Gunhilda snapped. "I'll be back two hours hence. Understand? The two o' yous best be in check by then." She glared at Radulf and Ugga. "Don't make me jinx you."

"Where're you off?" said Goodwin, rather surprised.

"Meeting Maeve at Old Elyn's, aren't I."

"Maeve, eh?" said Ugga, licking his lips. "Send 'er my love, won't ya?"

Gunhilda threw him a disgusted look before kissing her husband on the cheek and making her way back towards the village. Radulf and Ugga threw their brooms aside and immediately began enjoying their small feast. Goodwin watched his wife disappear before turning around to join them. Ugga was filling himself with as much wine as he could hold while Radulf was laying on his back, seemingly muttering to himself. Although they were his friends he had to admit that his wife was right.

"Look yous two really need to get your act together," said Goodwin.

"Eh?" said Ugga.

"Gunhilda can be a bit harsh sometimes but this time I think she's dead on. We need to win so I need yous two to pull your weight. For starters, you could try drinking less wine."

"Le- less _wine?"_ he repeated. "Ha ha ha!"

"I'm serious."

"HA!"

Goodwin narrowed his eyes and turned towards Radulf.

"And you, Radulf."

"Sorry, what?" asked Radulf.

"You need to stop daydreamin' so much. What's so interesting that you lose focus all the damn time?"

Radulf sat up and shrugged.

"Well because when you are imagining, you might as well imagine something worthwhile. An' if yous are imagining something worthwhile then chances are you're gonna be enchanted by it."

"Yeah, yeah," Goodwin muttered.

"An' anyway, what about your missus, eh?" said Ugga.

"What you talkin' about?"

"Ain't you worried about 'er playing against Ilkley next week?"

"Why would I be?"

"'Cos she's the only woman playing and yous know what them Ilkley folk are like."

"It'll be alright, I'll protect her if I 'ave to. Not that she'd need it. Have you met my wife?"

"I'm just sayin' I wouldn't let any wife of mine near 'em."

"You'd need to find someone who'll have you first, Ugga," said Radulf.

Ugga grabbed his wand and pointed it ferociously at Radulf but nothing happened. He began to bang it against the grass in attempts to get it working but swiftly stopped as he saw Goodwin and Radulf rolling around on the floor with laughter.

"What's so funny, eh?" said Ugga.

Goodwin and Radulf exchanged a look before bursting into laughter again at Ugga's annoyance. His face had turned bright red and Radulf was now choking on his hysteria. Goodwin began to pat Radulf on the back, poorly controlling his own mirth.

"Sh- should… ha ha… should we… HA! Should we tell him that it's fake?" said Goodwin.

"You little- come 'ere!"

Ugga threw away the stick and lunged at the two of them. For a few minutes, the three of them struggled until Ugga decided that they had been punished enough and began to see the funny side of things. They enjoyed the rest of their feast and not long after they saw Gunhilda approaching them.

"Don't forget what I said earlier," Ugga muttered.

The rest of the afternoon passed in a blur and Goodwin found he was extremely exhausted from the day's practice but couldn't seem to sleep. He lay awake in bed that night mulling over Ugga's words. Was he right? Should he stop Gunhilda from playing for her own good? To keep her safe? She could handle herself, he knew, but Ilkley were a sordid bunch.

For the next week, the team practices intensified but Goodwin found himself distracted on more than one occasion. He couldn't help but think about Gunhilda's safety. Two days before the match and Goodwin had made up his mind. He knew that his wife would never willingly sit out of the match and so had devised a plan to stop her from playing without knowing.

By nightfall the day before the match Gunhilda had taken ill with a high fever. She insisted that she would be better by morning and went to bed early so to better rest. The next morning her skin had turned a greenish colour and red bumps had appeared seemingly overnight. The local physician declared her to have contracted the dreaded Dragon Pox and prescribed bed rest. Goodwin smirked internally. He knew that this was not true Dragon Pox, and he had managed to fool everyone with a few spells.

Gunhilda was extremely disappointed not to be able to play but wished him luck all the same as he headed to the match and what a match it was. There were a few hiccups throughout the match, including Radulf being hit with a Blooder and the other team's beaters attacking Ugga with their clubs, but they scored a whopping forty-two times and absolutely decimated the Ilkley team. Oona, the innkeeper at the only tavern in Towton, had supplied the barrels they had used to score with and offered the team free mead for their win.

As Goodwin sat in the inn, surrounded by the entire village, he thought himself extremely clever for tricking his wife. Furthermore, he knew himself to have done the right thing. The Ilkley team were more brutish than he'd realised and so he knew that he'd made the right decision by protecting her. By way of congratulations for the great game he played and the excellent way he'd handled the situation Goodwin decided to drink as much of the free mead he could handle.

It wasn't until the early hours of the morning that Goodwin finally left the tavern and headed towards home. Although the inn was only around 20 steps from his house it took him quite a while to get home. Finally, he stumbled through the door to find Gunhilda with a face like thunder.

"Gunhilda," said Goodwin. "Should you not be resting?"

"Perhaps I would be if my husband were not a lying, inconsiderate toe-rag!"

"Come now… what do you mean, deares- HEY!"

He had to flatten himself against the wall as a curse flew across his face, just missing his nose. It was then that he noticed Gunhilda's symptoms seemed to be disappearing and in her hand she held several of the red bumps that had appeared on her body.

"Oh," said Goodwin, finally comprehending.

"Yes," Gunhilda spat. "'Oh'"

"Wh- what you have to understand, Gunhilda, is that it was in your best interest!"

"Really?" She shot another curse at him which he barely dodged in time. "How is _that_ exactly."

"Well the team from Ilkley, they're just extremely boisterous and I didn't want you to get hurt because you're so small and delicate and I knew that you wouldn't sit out if I asked so I had to create a reason for you not to play. I had to protect you and keep you safe like Ugga said."

"Ugga? I see." There was a dangerous glint in her eyes and Goodwin gulped. "So if I was a foot taller, would it have made a difference? If I had short hair and a beard with a member between my legs would you have stopped me playing then?"

"I- I- I- OW! MY FINGERS!"

"Find somewhere else to sleep tonight. Perhaps with _Ugga_!"

With that she shoved him back outside and slammed the door in his face. Goodwin turned and began to walk in search of a bed for the night but had a wide smile on his face. He had managed to protect his wife, albeit the fact that she clearly did not need protecting, and had only lost a few fingers as punishment. All in all, it had gone far better than he could have ever imagined.


End file.
